A (Slightly) Less Crappy 2005 Ahead for Poop

You never want your starting QB talking retirement as you head into a season, but McNair will likely get the nod for Poop (at least for now)

YARMOUTH, ME - After a miraculous run to the AFC Championship game in 2003, Bear Poop and owner Brian Davidson fell back to earth at a meteoric pace in 2004, ultimately finishing 3-10 in the very weak AFC East. The only good news of last year's campaign may have been that Poop was able to garner the first overall pick in this year's draft by winning the Stupor Bowl, but even that victory was bittersweet since it came over Davidson's other team, the Memphis Brothers.

Poop's downfall last year can be directly attributed to their lack of a consistent running game. While Correll Buckhalter shouldered most of the load in '03, a season-ending injury left Bear Poop with a scrap heap collection of backups and draft picks that never panned out at the RB position. The backfield's 2004 season may have been best summed up in Week 12 - in their best effort of the season, Najeh Davenport scored twice only to lose to the Llamas and former Poop back Jerome Bettis who ran for 100 yds and a TD, securing a career year after Davidson had cut him loose just 2 short years ago. It was just one of those years for this one-time back-to-back Super Bowl champion.

Biggest Question Facing Owner Brian Davidson

Who starts at QB? For the lack of depth at RB, Poop is actually in fairly good shape at the other positions including quarterback. With Tom Brady, Steve McNair and Jeff Garcia going into the season, owner Brian Davidson will have a tough choice to make each week as he fills out his lineup. Davidson's affinity for McNair will probably make him the starter coming out of camp but Brady and even Garcia, who experts say will take over the Lions offense at some point this season are sure to challenge for the spot, especially if McNair's patchwork body can't hold up.

Draft Outlook

Davidson's RB draft dillemas have been well documented, particularly with Bear Poop. You don't get to the point of having no starters on your roster without a few Ron Dayne's or a Curtis Enis along the way. With that said, Poop holds the first overall pick and are sure to take a running back - the only question is who will it be? Davidson has thrown around Ronnie Brown, Cadillac Williams and Cedric Benson in recent discussions but has been noncommital. With the Brothers having the 2nd overall pick, he has the luxury of selecting the best pairing with other personnel and still get 2 backs from this pool.

Probable Starters

McNair, #1 Draft Pick, C. Johnson, Moss, Clayton, Crumpler, Reed, Calico

Final Observations

If Bear Poop can muster any kind of running attack, they could once again visit the playoffs, especially while the AFC East remains relatively weak. Their receiving corps should be much improved as Michael Clayton continues to mature, Tyrone Calico appears to be healthy and Chad Johnson benefits from Carson Palmer's second full season. If Davidson is able to land a big-time running back and Chris Perry somehow wrangles the RB position away from Rudi Johnson in Cincinnati, we could be looking at a serious contender in a couple years. However, those are big if's (especially with Davidson's RB history) and still a couple years away - look for Poop to be improved but still be picking early in 2006.

Projected Record

4-9; 4th in AFC East